The Experience of Emotional Cutoff from the Perspective of Adult Female Children: A Qualitative Study

Document Type : Original Article

Authors

1 Assistant Professor, Department of Counseling, Faculty of Educational Sciences and Psychology, Shahid Beheshti University, Tehran, Iran.

2 Ph.D. Student in Psychology, Faculty of Humanities, Tarbiat Modares University, Tehran, Iran

3 Ph.D. Student in Psychology, Faculty of Educational Sciences and Psychology, Ferdowsi University of Mashhad, Mashhad, Iran.

10.48308/apsy.2024.234153.1592

Abstract

Aim: The present study was conducted to identify and understand adult girls' lived experiences of emotional cutoff from their families. Method: The present research method was qualitative, descriptive phenomenology. The sample studied included 15 adult girls, ages 18-25, who experienced emotional cutoff from their families. The average age of the participants was 21.5 years. Purposive and snowball sampling methods were used. First, by using the emotional cutting subscale in the revised self-differentiation questionnaire (Skowron and Friedlander, 1988), people with emotional cutting experience were selected and then in the second phase, a semi-structured interview was conducted, which was then implemented verbatim and analyzed using Colaizzi's (1969) seven-step method. Result: In this study, 5 main themes including 1) practical factors in the decision to emotionally cutoff; 2) the difficulties in implementing the decision to emotionally cutoff; 3) injuries caused by emotional cutoff; 4) adjustment to emotional cut off and 5) developmental aspects of emotional cut off were identified. Discussion: Findings indicate that adult girls who experience emotional cutoff from their families face serious challenges and experience significant damage and that there is a need to provide them and their families with support systems that are appropriate for their conditions.

Highlights

Akers-Woody, M. D. (2003). Understanding the attitudes toward marriage of never-married female young adult children of divorce using Bowen Theory. Alliant International University, San Diego. [Link] Amato, P. R. (1988). Parental divorce and attitudes toward marriage and family life. Journal of Marriage and the Family, 453-461. [Link] Arnett, J. J. (2000). Emerging adulthood: A theory of development from the late teens through the twenties. American Psychologist, 55, 469–480. [Link] Baharshanjani, S., Nazarboland, N., Falahzade, H. (2022). The Comparison of the Emotional Reactivity and Theory of Mind of girls based on Mothers' Emotional Expression Styles. Master's thesis in family counseling, Shahid Beheshti University, Journal of Applied Psychology. [Link] Becvar, D. S., & Becvar, R. J. (2013). Family therapy: A systemic integration. Boston, MA: Pearson Education. Becvar, D. S., & Becvar, R. J. (2006). Family therapy: A systemic integration Boston. MA: Pearson Education. Booth, A., Brinkerhoff, D. B., & White, L. K. (1984). The impact of parental divorce on courtship. Journal of Marriage and the Family, 85-94. [Link] Bowen, M. (1978). Family Therapy in Clinical Practice. New York (Aronson) 1978. [Link] BRİDGE, E. N. (2019). Review of a case study in light of Bowen theory: Differentiation of self. Yaşam Becerileri Psikoloji Dergisi, 3(5), 65-72. [Link] Chmielewska, M. (2012). Marital quality in the context of interpersonal dependency. Economics & Sociology, 5(2), 58. [Link] Cheraghi, Mona; Ebrahimi, Maryam. (2017). Psychological Analysis of Parent-Child Relationship in Iranian Proverbs: A Qualitative Study. Family Studies, 14(3), 383-410. [Link] Dear, G. E., Roberts, C. M., & Lange, L. (2005). Defining codependency: A thematic analysis of published definitions. Advances in psychology research, 34, 189-205. [Link] Devlin, Karen (2019). Family Systems Theory Definition & What Is It? Retrieved from [Link]

Dindoost, M., & Cheraghi, M. (2023). Children's Lived Experiences Of Parental Extramarital Relationship. Quarterly of Applide Psychology. [Link]

Duara, R., Hugh-Jones, S., & Madill, A. (2018). Photo-elicitation and time-lining to enhance the research interview: exploring the quarterlife crisis of young adults in India and the United Kingdom. Qualitative Research in Psychology. [Link] Gabardi, L., & Rosen, L. (1993). Intimate relationships: College students from divorced and intact families. Journal of Divorce & Remarriage, 18(3-4), 25-56. [Link] Gradaílle, R., Montserrat, C., & Ballester, L. (2018). Transition to adulthood from foster care in Spain: A biographical approach. Children and Youth Services Review, 89, 54–61. [Link] Guerin, A., & Kniskern, D. P. (1981). Handbook of family therapy. New York: Aronson Hall, J. (2009). House subcommittee reviews combat PTSD: VA process overly burdensome. [Link] Haefner, J. (2014). An application of Bowen family systems theory. Issues in mental health nursing, 35(11), 835-841. [Link] Heard, D. H. (1978). From object relations to attachment theory: a basis for family therapy. British Journal of Medical Psychology, 51(1), 67-76. [Link] Herman, J. L. (2015). Trauma and recovery: The aftermath of violence--from domestic abuse to political terror. Hachette UK. [Link] Higley, E. (2019). Defining Young Adulthood. [Link] Jahanbakhshi, Z., Kalantarkousheh, S. (2012). Relationship between dimensions of Early Maladaptive Schemas and desire for marriage among females and males students at Allameh Tabatabai University. Family Counseling and Psychotherapy, 2(2), 234-256. [Link] Johnson, P., Schamuhn, T. D., Nelson, D. B., & Buboltz Jr, W. C. (2014). Differentiation levels of college students: Effects on vocational identity and career decision making. The Career Development Quarterly, 62(1), 70-80. [Link] Kerr, M. E. (2019). Bowen theory's secrets: Revealing the hidden life of families. Norton & Company.Kinnaird, K. L., & Gerrard, M. (1986). Premarital sexual behavior and attitudes toward marriage and divorce among young women as a function of their mothers' marital status. Journal of Marriage and the Family, 757-765. [Link] Lampis, J., & Cataudella, S. (2019). Adult attachment and differentiation of self-constructs: A possible dialogue? Contemporary Family Therapy, 41(3), 227-235. [Link] Larson, J. H., Benson, M. J., Wilson, S. M., & Medora, N. (1998). Family of origin influences on marital attitudes and readiness for marriage in late adolescents. Journal of family issues, 19(6), 750-768. [Link]

Lim, S. A., & Lee, J. (2020). Gender differences in the relationships between parental marital conflict, differentiation from the family of origin, and children’s marital stability. The American Journal of Family Therapy, 48(5), 546-561. [Link]

Long, N., Forehand, R., Fauber, R., & Brody, G. H. (1987). Self-perceived and independently observed competence of young adolescents as a function of parental marital conflict and recent divorce. Journal of abnormal child psychology, 15(1), 15-27. [Link] Mann-Feder, V. R. (2019). How can I be a real adult? Developmental theory as a framework for practice, policy, and research on care leaving. In V. R. Mann-Feder & M. Goyette (Eds.), Leaving care and the transition to adulthood (pp. 9–30). Oxford University Press. [Link] Mendes, P., Baidawi, S., & Snow, P. (2014). Young people transitioning from out-of-home care: A critical analysis of leaving care policy, legislation and housing support in the Australian state of Victoria. Child Abuse Review, 23, 402–414. [Link] Mohaghegh Toosi, F., Sharbaf, H. A., Fathi, M., & Kareshki, H. (2022). The effectiveness of cognitive developmental hypnotherapy on differentiation of self, meaning in life and marital conflicts in married women. American Journal of Clinical Hypnosis, 64(3), 248-262. [Link] Nichols, M. P., & Schwartz, R. C. (2005). Family therapy: Concepts and methods. 5th edition. New York: Gardner Press. Palmer, P. A. (2017). PREDICTING COLLEGE STUDENTS’DIFFERENTIATION OF SELF WITH DIMENSIONS OF EXECUTIVE FUNCTIONING SKILLS (Doctoral dissertation, Middle Tennessee State University). [Link] Pasha-Sharifi, H., Manavipour, D., & Askari, F. (2014). Psychometric properties of the differentiation of self-inventory. J Ind/Organ Psychol, 5(18), 9-22. [Link] Peach-Storey, G. A. (2020). The Impact of Parent Training in Instable Families (Doctoral dissertation, The Ohio State University). [Link] Schmidt, U., & Moritz, M.-T. (2009). Familiensoziologie. Transcript.Simon, H. L. M., DiPlacido, J., & Conway, J. M. (2019). Attachment styles in college students and depression: The mediating role of self differentiation. Mental Health & Prevention, 13, 135-142. [Link] Skowron, E. A., Holmes, S. E., & Sabatelli, R. M. (2003). Deconstructing differentiation: Self-regulation, interdependent relating, and well-being in adulthood. Contemporary Family Therapy, 25(1), 111-129. [Link] Skowron, E. A., Stanley, K. L., & Shapiro, M. D. (2009). A longitudinal perspective on differentiation of self, interpersonal and psychological well-being in young adulthood. Contemporary Family Therapy, 31(1), 3-18. [Link] Spira, M., Perkins, N. H., & Gilman, A. H. (2020). Trauma from physical and emotional sibling violence as a potential risk factor for elder abuse. Journal of gerontological social work, 63(3), 162-173. [Link] Sting, S., Groinig, M. (2020). CARE LEAVERS’ PERSPECTIVES ON THE FAMILY IN THE TRANSITIO FROM OUT-OF-HOME CARE TO INDEPENDENT LIVING. International Journal of Child, Youth & Family Studies, 11(4.2) 140-159. [Link] Tasca, G. A., Szadkowski, L., Illing, V., Trinneer, A., Grenon, R., Demidenko, N., & Bissada, H. (2009). Adult attachment, depression, and eating disorder symptoms: The mediating role of affect regulation strategies. Personality and individual differences, 47(6), 662-667. [Link] Telzer, E. H., & Fuligni, A. J. (2009). Daily family assistance and the psychological well-being of adolescents from Latin American, Asian, and European backgrounds. Developmental psychology, 45(4), 1177. [Link] Theile, M. (2015). Soziale Netzwerkbeziehungen all Ressouce. Soziale Beziehungen im Lebenslauf von Jugendlichen in der Heimerziehung [Social network relationships as a resource: Social relationships in the biography of young people in residential care]. Universitätsverlag Siegen Zentrum für Planung und Evaluation Sozialer Dienste.Wade, J. (2008). The ties that bind: Support from birth families and substitute families for young people leaving care. British Journal of Social Work, 38, 39–54. [Link] Wei, M., Mallinckrodt, B., Russell, D. W., & Abraham, W. T. (2004). Maladaptive perfectionism as a mediator and moderator between adult attachment and depressive mood. Journal of Counseling Psychology, 51(2), 201. [Link]

Keywords

Main Subjects

References

Akers-Woody, M. D. (2003). Understanding the attitudes toward marriage of never-married female young adult children of divorce using Bowen Theory. Alliant International University, San Diego. [Link] Amato, P. R. (1988). Parental divorce and attitudes toward marriage and family life. Journal of Marriage and the Family, 453-461. [Link] Arnett, J. J. (2000). Emerging adulthood: A theory of development from the late teens through the twenties. American Psychologist, 55, 469–480. [Link] Baharshanjani, S., Nazarboland, N., Falahzade, H. (2022). The Comparison of the Emotional Reactivity and Theory of Mind of girls based on Mothers' Emotional Expression Styles. Master's thesis in family counseling, Shahid Beheshti University, Journal of Applied Psychology. [Link] Becvar, D. S., & Becvar, R. J. (2013). Family therapy: A systemic integration. Boston, MA: Pearson Education. Becvar, D. S., & Becvar, R. J. (2006). Family therapy: A systemic integration Boston. MA: Pearson Education. Booth, A., Brinkerhoff, D. B., & White, L. K. (1984). The impact of parental divorce on courtship. Journal of Marriage and the Family, 85-94. [Link] Bowen, M. (1978). Family Therapy in Clinical Practice. New York (Aronson) 1978. [Link] BRİDGE, E. N. (2019). Review of a case study in light of Bowen theory: Differentiation of self. Yaşam Becerileri Psikoloji Dergisi, 3(5), 65-72. [Link] Chmielewska, M. (2012). Marital quality in the context of interpersonal dependency. Economics & Sociology, 5(2), 58. [Link] Cheraghi, Mona; Ebrahimi, Maryam. (2017). Psychological Analysis of Parent-Child Relationship in Iranian Proverbs: A Qualitative Study. Family Studies, 14(3), 383-410. [Link] Dear, G. E., Roberts, C. M., & Lange, L. (2005). Defining codependency: A thematic analysis of published definitions. Advances in psychology research, 34, 189-205. [Link] Devlin, Karen (2019). Family Systems Theory Definition & What Is It? Retrieved from [Link]
Dindoost, M., & Cheraghi, M. (2023). Children's Lived Experiences Of Parental Extramarital Relationship. Quarterly of Applide Psychology. [Link]
Duara, R., Hugh-Jones, S., & Madill, A. (2018). Photo-elicitation and time-lining to enhance the research interview: exploring the quarterlife crisis of young adults in India and the United Kingdom. Qualitative Research in Psychology. [Link] Gabardi, L., & Rosen, L. (1993). Intimate relationships: College students from divorced and intact families. Journal of Divorce & Remarriage, 18(3-4), 25-56. [Link] Gradaílle, R., Montserrat, C., & Ballester, L. (2018). Transition to adulthood from foster care in Spain: A biographical approach. Children and Youth Services Review, 89, 54–61. [Link] Guerin, A., & Kniskern, D. P. (1981). Handbook of family therapy. New York: Aronson Hall, J. (2009). House subcommittee reviews combat PTSD: VA process overly burdensome. [Link] Haefner, J. (2014). An application of Bowen family systems theory. Issues in mental health nursing, 35(11), 835-841. [Link] Heard, D. H. (1978). From object relations to attachment theory: a basis for family therapy. British Journal of Medical Psychology, 51(1), 67-76. [Link] Herman, J. L. (2015). Trauma and recovery: The aftermath of violence--from domestic abuse to political terror. Hachette UK. [Link] Higley, E. (2019). Defining Young Adulthood. [Link] Jahanbakhshi, Z., Kalantarkousheh, S. (2012). Relationship between dimensions of Early Maladaptive Schemas and desire for marriage among females and males students at Allameh Tabatabai University. Family Counseling and Psychotherapy, 2(2), 234-256. [Link] Johnson, P., Schamuhn, T. D., Nelson, D. B., & Buboltz Jr, W. C. (2014). Differentiation levels of college students: Effects on vocational identity and career decision making. The Career Development Quarterly, 62(1), 70-80. [Link] Kerr, M. E. (2019). Bowen theory's secrets: Revealing the hidden life of families. Norton & Company.Kinnaird, K. L., & Gerrard, M. (1986). Premarital sexual behavior and attitudes toward marriage and divorce among young women as a function of their mothers' marital status. Journal of Marriage and the Family, 757-765. [Link] Lampis, J., & Cataudella, S. (2019). Adult attachment and differentiation of self-constructs: A possible dialogue? Contemporary Family Therapy, 41(3), 227-235. [Link] Larson, J. H., Benson, M. J., Wilson, S. M., & Medora, N. (1998). Family of origin influences on marital attitudes and readiness for marriage in late adolescents. Journal of family issues, 19(6), 750-768. [Link]
Lim, S. A., & Lee, J. (2020). Gender differences in the relationships between parental marital conflict, differentiation from the family of origin, and children’s marital stability. The American Journal of Family Therapy, 48(5), 546-561. [Link]
Long, N., Forehand, R., Fauber, R., & Brody, G. H. (1987). Self-perceived and independently observed competence of young adolescents as a function of parental marital conflict and recent divorce. Journal of abnormal child psychology, 15(1), 15-27. [Link] Mann-Feder, V. R. (2019). How can I be a real adult? Developmental theory as a framework for practice, policy, and research on care leaving. In V. R. Mann-Feder & M. Goyette (Eds.), Leaving care and the transition to adulthood (pp. 9–30). Oxford University Press. [Link] Mendes, P., Baidawi, S., & Snow, P. (2014). Young people transitioning from out-of-home care: A critical analysis of leaving care policy, legislation and housing support in the Australian state of Victoria. Child Abuse Review, 23, 402–414. [Link] Mohaghegh Toosi, F., Sharbaf, H. A., Fathi, M., & Kareshki, H. (2022). The effectiveness of cognitive developmental hypnotherapy on differentiation of self, meaning in life and marital conflicts in married women. American Journal of Clinical Hypnosis, 64(3), 248-262. [Link] Nichols, M. P., & Schwartz, R. C. (2005). Family therapy: Concepts and methods. 5th edition. New York: Gardner Press. Palmer, P. A. (2017). PREDICTING COLLEGE STUDENTS’DIFFERENTIATION OF SELF WITH DIMENSIONS OF EXECUTIVE FUNCTIONING SKILLS (Doctoral dissertation, Middle Tennessee State University). [Link] Pasha-Sharifi, H., Manavipour, D., & Askari, F. (2014). Psychometric properties of the differentiation of self-inventory. J Ind/Organ Psychol, 5(18), 9-22. [Link] Peach-Storey, G. A. (2020). The Impact of Parent Training in Instable Families (Doctoral dissertation, The Ohio State University). [Link] Schmidt, U., & Moritz, M.-T. (2009). Familiensoziologie. Transcript.Simon, H. L. M., DiPlacido, J., & Conway, J. M. (2019). Attachment styles in college students and depression: The mediating role of self differentiation. Mental Health & Prevention, 13, 135-142. [Link] Skowron, E. A., Holmes, S. E., & Sabatelli, R. M. (2003). Deconstructing differentiation: Self-regulation, interdependent relating, and well-being in adulthood. Contemporary Family Therapy, 25(1), 111-129. [Link] Skowron, E. A., Stanley, K. L., & Shapiro, M. D. (2009). A longitudinal perspective on differentiation of self, interpersonal and psychological well-being in young adulthood. Contemporary Family Therapy, 31(1), 3-18. [Link] Spira, M., Perkins, N. H., & Gilman, A. H. (2020). Trauma from physical and emotional sibling violence as a potential risk factor for elder abuse. Journal of gerontological social work, 63(3), 162-173. [Link] Sting, S., Groinig, M. (2020). CARE LEAVERS’ PERSPECTIVES ON THE FAMILY IN THE TRANSITIO FROM OUT-OF-HOME CARE TO INDEPENDENT LIVING. International Journal of Child, Youth & Family Studies, 11(4.2) 140-159. [Link] Tasca, G. A., Szadkowski, L., Illing, V., Trinneer, A., Grenon, R., Demidenko, N., & Bissada, H. (2009). Adult attachment, depression, and eating disorder symptoms: The mediating role of affect regulation strategies. Personality and individual differences, 47(6), 662-667. [Link] Telzer, E. H., & Fuligni, A. J. (2009). Daily family assistance and the psychological well-being of adolescents from Latin American, Asian, and European backgrounds. Developmental psychology, 45(4), 1177. [Link] Theile, M. (2015). Soziale Netzwerkbeziehungen all Ressouce. Soziale Beziehungen im Lebenslauf von Jugendlichen in der Heimerziehung [Social network relationships as a resource: Social relationships in the biography of young people in residential care]. Universitätsverlag Siegen Zentrum für Planung und Evaluation Sozialer Dienste.Wade, J. (2008). The ties that bind: Support from birth families and substitute families for young people leaving care. British Journal of Social Work, 38, 39–54. [Link] Wei, M., Mallinckrodt, B., Russell, D. W., & Abraham, W. T. (2004). Maladaptive perfectionism as a mediator and moderator between adult attachment and depressive mood. Journal of Counseling Psychology, 51(2), 201. [Link]
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